Today is Sunday. And, incidentally, the last day of my NaBloPoMoMoMo. How did I do? Did I get a post in every day?

So what’s so special about Sundays?

On any typical visit to Brisbane, and for as long as I can remember, Sunday has been the day we visit Nanny and Grandpa’s place for a meal. Most recently (as in the last decade) it has been an 11am meal. We would normally stay for a couple of hours while Nanny served up 3 courses of delicious foods. It would be mostly the same each week, but every now and then she would surprise us with something “a bit different. Just for fun.”

We won’t be going to lunch at Nanny and Grandpa’s today. Nanny’s not doing so well. We don’t know what the future holds for her, but we do know that she won’t be cooking for us at her place again. It’s the end of an era. No more will we sit around Nanny and Grandpa’s kitchen table and laugh and joke and tell Nanny she has cooked too much again. Or listen to her and Grandpa tell stories. Or get a tap on the shoulder and be beckoned to the “back room” where she would give us a little present she had bought for us. We won’t get to see her wave us goodbye from her gate, not going inside until she can’t see the car anymore.

How do you say goodbye to someone who’s still here, but at the same time, isn’t?

It’s times like these…

… that I wish I smoked.

Okay, so clearly that statement is untrue on pretty much every single level. Except for the fact that I am so restless and fidgety and stressed out at the moment, and I’ve started biting my nails again, and when I see smokers, inhaling deeply, they seem to blow away their troubles with that lungful of smoke.

And smoking is cool. Well, at least it used to be. Let’s not deny it people! James Dean anyone? Carrie Bradshaw? Why else would people smoke, if not to look cool*? I mean, it’s not like it tastes any good, or does your health any favours. Let’s all just admit it. There’s something cool and sexy about smoking. I know that’s why I experimented with cigarettes (I’m such a rebel) while I was at uni. A few of the people I hung out with at uni smoked while we were out drinking, so, being the little sheep that I can be, I gave it a whirl. And it was oh-so-foul, but you know, it was cool. I felt cool. I’m sure I looked like an idiot (I probably scrunched up my face from the yucky taste and didn’t inhale properly!) And it made me sick. I have asthma and I know it exacerbated it. I’m even quite convinced it gave me a horrible old man cough that stuck around for 18 months.

Why did I stop? I tried one while I was stone cold sober. That was it for me. I’ve never touched them since, and have reverted back to my snooty-nose face when I get stuck walking behind someone who is smoking, or when I’m on my way in to the hospital to visit Nanny, and all the smokers (and there are lots) are crowding around the gates to have their cigarettes because you can no longer smoke inside government grounds.

But to have that feeling of blowing all your problems away, into the wind, even if it’s just a feeling and not an actuality… Well. That is certainly appealing.

*obviously, apart from the whole addiction thing

Garage sale

Before we left Wang, we had a garage sale to try and get rid of excess stuff. And boy did we have excess stuff. I think I put out as many clothes as I had left in my wardrobe! I decided it was time to get rid of things that “might fit me one day” and just start fresh. (i.e. more op-shop clothes!) We were told to expect early callers, so we made a starting time of 8:30am on the Saturday morning. At 7:40am, a woman turned up and commented on how we weren’t very organised and told us “I’ve been up since before 6:00am!” And that’s my problem, how?? So she proceeded to help us set up, just so she could get through looking at everything and obviously move on to the next one. Sheesh!

We got rid of some furniture and a lot of crap, but hardly any clothes and not the big stuff like the big desks (one of which we ended up taking to our new place) or the couch or chairs.

Hubs and I were really looking forward to having the garage sale – neither of us had ever had one before – but I’ve gotta say, it wasn’t all it was cracked up to be. In fact, it was kind of depressing watching people go through our stuff and decide that they didn’t want it. Like it wasn’t good enough for them. I said to Hubs “if I had come to this garage sale, I would have bought all these clothes!” Funny about that…

Anyway, we made a few hundred dollars and donated the remaining things to Vinnies, so it was a moderately successful day for us, and a more successful day for Vinnies. Next time we might skip the middle man and just send our stuff straight to Vinnies

Here’s Hubs and Chanbe at our garage sale. It was a very very cold morning and we’d had frost overnight. We had set everything up under our carport, but once the frost started melting, all the condensation poured onto the goods (you can see it on the ground) so we had to move everything out from under cover until it stopped! Funny!

And today we saw Grandpa!

Chance really put on a lovely show and it was lovely to see Grandpa with a smile on his face.

It’s been a very tough time for him, understandably, and it was great to see that he is being so well looked after. He is currently in a respite care facility and although he misses Nanny terribly and would rather be in his own home, he is doing as well as can be expected.

We saw Nanny again today and she actually opened her eyes and was reaching out to us which was really great. It’s still early days and things can change rapidly and significantly but we’re all hoping for the best.

I saw Nanny today

It was hard. Really hard. I haven’t had to face this sort of situation – sickness of a loved one – many times in my life. In fact, I can probably count on one hand. But today I saw a woman lying in bed, hooked up to leads and tubes, and I knew it was Nanny, but it wasn’t. This is how I remember Nanny:

I keep trying to reason with myself that Nanny is 87 (88 next month) and has had a great life and and and… but it doesn’t make it easier. This woman has been in my life in so many different ways from the day that I was born. And to see her this way is breaking my heart.

We don’t really know what the prognosis is at this stage; we just have to take it one day at a time. So that’s what we’ll do.

(Thank you so much for all your thoughts and prayers and texts.)

The other other cake

Hubs wanted a “jelly pool” cake. So, you know, I made one. It was pretty yummy and lots of fun! (I really should take more care with the backgrounds for my photos, but… well… you know… whatever….)

Snow bunnies

While Michael and Lea and family were visiting, we took a trip up to Falls Creek for a day in the snow. We had bought up big at ALDI’s snow sale, so we were prepared for anything… or so we thought. Dad even gave Chanbe his silk balaclava to wear!

Unbeknownst to us bottom-of-the-mountain folk, it was snowing up the top! We arrived, snow chains at the ready, around lunch time and got straight into the white stuff.

Or perhaps to put it more accurately, it got straight in to us. It was snowing pretty hard up the top and it was pretty darn cold and windy! Not that Chance cared much!

It got a bit much for me after a while so Chance and I headed indoors to thaw out and have a bite to eat while the rest of the gang played in the snow. After this, we headed around to “Windy Corner” for some tabogganing. The name didn’t lie.

Thankfully, Hubs took Chance for a while on the ergo, as I was having a hard time juggling a 10kg baby (not literally – but what a sight that would be!) and all those darn layers!

I had a couple of runs on the taboggan, but I kinda sucked at it, so Hubs took Chance for a go. Fun!

We decided to hunker down at the hut for a rest and another thaw-out so I carried Chance there in the windy snow. It was haaaaaaard work. That 50m seemed like an eternity! But we made it and were followed not long after by the rest of our group.

So again, Chance and I were happy to hang out there while everyone else went for round 2 on the taboggan slope. We then headed back down to the car and after another bite to eat, hit the road. We had to use snow chains on the way down as it was very icy indeed. We all got home safe and sound and that hot shower I had was one of the best ever. Hubs has been up the mountain twice since then for a bit of snowboarding action, and is up there again today. He’s got to make good use of his season pass that he got for his birthday!! As to when I’ll be back up there? Well, the jury’s still out on that one…