Prepare for some nonsense. When I was 10 years old, I was involved in my primary school’s production of James and the Giant Peach – a play based on Roald Dahl‘s famous book. When the time came for auditions, everyone wanted to be either Aunt Sponge or Aunt Spiker, (including me – I was a follower), cos clearly, wanting to be one of the insects – a male insect no less – was totally weird. My grade 5 teacher, who I’m not ashamed to say I had a HUGE crush on, suggested I give the Centipede part a try. So I did. And it actually ended up being one of the main parts, with a few solo songs to sing! (I may have been a follower, but I always liked like a bit of attention!)
Mum and I made an awesome costume which consisted of a black shirt, black pants, black top-hat and lots of legs made with stockings stuffed with newspaper, all strung together, dangling off my arms. Was it the best costume there? Well. That’s not really for me to say 🙂
I practised my lines diligently, and learned my songs by heart. I recall that I was very nervous leading up to it, but I believe I performed well and don’t think I forgot any of my lines. And it was a LOT of fun.
So what is the point of this little story, you may ask? Well. The point is, I may not be able to remember what I did a week ago, but I can still remember the lines to one of my songs in the play:
I’ve eaten fresh mudburgers by the greatest cooks there are
And scrambled eggs and stinkbug’s legs and hornets stewed in tar
And pails of snails and lizards tails and beetles by the jar
A beetle is improved by just a splash of vinegar
I’m mad for crispy wasp-stings on a piece of buttered toast
And pickled spines of porcupines and then a gorgeous roast
Of dragon’s flesh, well hung, not fresh, it costs a pound at most
And comes to you by carriage, If you order it by post
For dinner on my birthday shall I tell you what I chose?
Hot noodles made from strudels on a slice of garden hose
And a rather smelly jelly made from armadillo’s toes
The Jelly is deeeee-licious, but you have to hold your nose
Now comes I do declare
The burden of my speech
These foods are rare, beyond compare
Some are right out of reach
But there’s no doubt I’d go without a million plates of eeeeeeeeeach
For one small mite
One tiny bite
Of this fantastic peeeeeach!
Ridiculous, no?*
* Oh my gosh I just googled the first line of the song and it came up! AND I remembered all the lines correctly! That IS ridiculous…
