Got some pro shots done of bump #4. Just for fun. Haven’t told/shown Hubs yet. Going to get some printed as a surprise. Really happy with them! Will share more laters.
Category: Happiness
Aaaaah marriage
What an interesting beast. Two people meet, they lust after one another, they fall in love, they can’t imagine ever being angered or pissed off by this person, they get married and WHAM! Reality hits. And it bites.
Now obviously this scenario isn’t true for all couples. Obviously some couples piss each other off much earlier than that.
When Hubs and I got together I remember (and now cringe) genuinely looking at my friends who had been in long term relationships and who were now in that comfortable stage and thinking “I’m so glad we are different.” (Sorry guys!) But here’s the kicker. We’re not. Hubs pisses me off all the time and, I know it’s hard to believe, but I’m no picnic to live with either.
And I totally get why marriages don’t last. (Freudian slip there – I actually typed “laugh” instead of last! Oh boy…) Marriage is haaaaaaaaaard work and unless you are both 100% committed, you’ve got no chance. It’s impossible for both parties to be 100% committed all the time, at the same time as well so I guess there’s just always got to be some desire and commitment to stay together.
And it’s the little things isn’t it? The day to day stuff that, if you don’t accept, will drive you out the door.
Take right now for instance. There is something that Hubs is doing right now that should have already been done but he didn’t want to do earlier and now there is a deadline (9am tomorrow) that is has to be done by. But pointing this out to him adds absolutely no value to our marriage. He knows it. I know it. To say anything would be petty and piss him off. So instead, I’ve done all my evening jobs, poured him an ice cold cider (it’s a laboring job he’s doing for our ensuite) and am drowning out the noise of the compact drill with the sound of satisfaction for taking the high road. And Adele.
It’s something I’m working on – not pointing out his flaws. I used to do it a lot, thinking I was being helpful by suggesting ways he could be more organised or be more tidy. And it’s something he’s never really done to me. I’m hopelessly flawed but he doesn’t try to fix me. He delights in my quirks because they make me who I am.
So in the grand scheme of things, tonight’s quirk matters not. What matters is how we deal with it. And the best way? Every time? Hands down?
Is with kindness. Good old fashioned, sometimes over the top kindness. On that note I might go and see if he needs another cider.
Do you have a clown?
I know I say it all the time but Darby is such a clown. It’s all about the laughs. If he gets them, he wants more, and Chance and Quinn are only too happy to oblige!
Actually those two photos were just him doing his thing today and hanging out, though he had me in stitches. He has taken to putting his pj pants on his head for story time because it has the other two in hysterics. I wonder what his next antics will be…
Girls night
I so need this right now. I can’t wait to go out and talk nonsense with my gal pals up here who I don’t mind saying, are some of the finest ladies I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I’m all frocked up and got the tick of approval from Quinny who said I looked so beautiful like a princess.
I couldn’t help myself, cooking for Hubs and his mum who is visiting, and the kids and having everything ready before I left. I kept justifying it by saying how easy it was: a slow cooked pulled pork with a loaf of bread in the bread maker and a wombok salad. One of my favourite easy meals.
I know Hubs would have thrown something together but I was just trying to be helpful. I guess it’s the good old mother-guilt kicking in.
Though I had to say, as I was getting ready, Chance was getting more and more feral and excitable and was taking Darby with him so I had no problem walking out the door and leaving him to it. As he reminds me from time to time, he’s been a parent for just as long as I have.
So even though I can’t get boozy and won’t be dancing too much I’ll be in the company of lovely ladies who know how to have a good time. It’s going to be a great night.
I know I’ll be made to eat my words
But kids get easier the older they get, right? I mean my Mum and her dear friend always say “the challenges don’t ever go away, they just change” or words to that effect. And yeah I get that. Maybe I’ve just been eyeball deep in the same challenges on repeat for the last 5 years that I’m looking forward to different challenges?
Like I’m really looking forward to not having to run interference with 2-year-olds every 30 seconds all day; I’m kind of looking forward to not having to wipe tiny bums anymore; I’ll be glad when my children are all old enough for school drop off and pick up to not involve me tearing after a toddler while trying to hold in my pelvic floor; I’m looking forward to engaging in more in depth conversations with the kids and reading chapter books with them.
I’m not wishing this time away and as I said, I know parents of older kids are reading this and laughing at me while shaking their heads. It’s all a challenge I suppose. The trick is to enjoy the ride!
Yee-ha.
Nearly got away with it
We went to Yeppoon today with my friend and her three kids as both of our husbands were working, and you know, safety in numbers. The weather forecast wasn’t great but we were determined. The first couple of hours looked a lot like this
Threatening but nothing much happening
The kids had an awesome time at the water park. It was a little more stressful for me than usual as I lost Darby 3 times – little bugger is doing runners and exploring as he pleases which had me on red alert the whole time!
And just as we were settling in to lunch the rains finally came down
Darby was safely tucked away in the stroller (where I had put him to stop him running away from me!)
In one of the slight lulls in rain we decided to make a dash for the car. The lull didn’t last long and we ended up getting completely drenched. It was pretty funny.
Look I’m not going to lie. I had contemplated just staying home all day with the kids and watching movies but I’m glad we got out and about. We all do better after we’ve been out of the house for the morning and we had a great afternoon and evening to start the week off well.
Hope your Sunday was a good one too.
Talk about a cool change!
People have been asking me for months how I’ve been coping with the heat and to be honest, up until three weeks ago I was going okay. Then it got hotter and I got bigger and all of a sudden I feel completely sapped of energy and patience.
Monday and Tuesday this week were particularly hot and humid and I was on the brink of tears for most of both days. And actually reduced to tears towards the end of my parenting day yesterday. 5pm meltdowns aren’t just for kids I tell you. We had the a/c cranking last night while watching a movie and kept it on as I fell asleep.
Then the rain came and the temperature dropped and I’ve had a spring in my step all day. Well comparatively anyway. Today has been so lovely. Rainy and cool and just what I needed for a break from the heat.
I’m not sure how long it will last but I promise I will be enjoying every minute.
UPDATE: It didn’t even last until school pick up ? I walked outside and almost gave up on the spot. Back to teary and cranky.
And some nights
I just don’t have it in me.
Even though I know an hour is all it would take tonight to do the kitchen and some tidying up that would make the rest of the week easier, I just can’t do it.
The heat + pregnancy + three kids is leaving me so drained and I’m just giving myself permission to rest. As long as my beautiful children are fed and loved, a full dishwasher, full sink and full basket of clothes makes no difference. Their bellies and hearts are just as full and that suits me just fine.
There’s always tomorrow.
Home scream home
Look I’m not going to lie. It’s good to be home. Even though a couple more nights with Hubs in Syds would have been amazing, I did miss the the kids and was keen to get back to them. I think part of that is because I have a renewed energy to do more with them; a great desire to be more present and to just play with them more.
Enter the screaming banshee.
Darby has literally just entered into a screaming phase and boy can this kid scream. Your first impulse is to throw your hand over his mouth just to stop the noise as quickly as possible. Not an ideal solution but an effective one in the short term.
And I don’t know if it was the thunder storm that rolled in this afternoon, that I’d been away, the fact that studies have shown that kids do in fact behave 800 times worse when their mother is in the room, or a combination of these factors, but the kids pretty much went feral and bat sh*t crazy this evening.
Just for me.
I’ve been assured by my parents that the kids have been perfectly well behaved in my absence, apart from a bit of screaming, which obviously is a relief but is also entirely unfair.
They saved it all for me. Aren’t they just darling? I certainly didn’t get eased back into family life but it’s what I’ve come to expect, and now that they are all in bed, sound asleep I can feel grateful for my wonderful kids.
Come home quickly Hubs. Your kids are missing you!
“Octonauts, to your stations!”
Alternatively, “Octonauts, let’s do this.”
Bath time can be a bit funny at our place. Sometimes, usually on a Friday evening when there is a movie to watch, it’s a 5-minute affair for all three of them. They get wet down, soaped up and then hosed off before being shipped to the other parent for PJ-assist.
Other evenings, like tonight, there’s no hurry. Tonight, the kids played Octonauts in the (ridiculously tiny) bath tub we have (a big plastic tub from Masters that they barely all fit in) for almost 40 minutes. It was honestly the cutest freaking thing you ever heard. Such music to my ears and I had time to clean the kitchen from start to finish.
It doesn’t happen all the time, but I’ve noticed they’ve been getting along better and better lately. Darby is getting to the age where he can join in on games instead of just trampling over them. And the older two are getting much better at including him.
Just bliss for this mama.
