Comfort factor

May 6, 2015 / Renae / Leave a comment

Last year sometime, Hubs made a comment that went something along the lines of “you don’t like to be uncomfortable.” Of course I took offence to this, as I’m always happy to leave my comfort zone for new adventures. I was living in Mount Isa for goodness sake!

But that’s not what he meant. He was saying that I don’t seem to like being uncomfortable. Like if it’s too hot or too cold or I’m pregnant or I’m sick or I’m injured. And I had to admit, once I thought about it, and after a couple of months of noticing certain behaviours of mine, he was right. I liked my environment, which included my physical self, to be comfortable.

So I started stepping out and seeing what I could do to better adapt to uncomfortable situations. And this year, I’ve really stepped it up a notch. When it’s hot, I still go for a walk. It’s always going to be hot, and commenting on it (read: whinging) will not change that fact. I sweat almost immediately, and start puffing not long after that, but I’m doing something positive for my body, so it’s worth being temporarily uncomfortable.

That’s the other thing I’m having realisations over. Nothing is forever. Everything is temporary. This too shall pass. (Yeuch. Cliche time.) My mother-in-law reminded me of this months ago: No matter how bad of a day I’m having, there has never been a day that hasn’t ended. I seem to have been having a few of those lately. It’s a mixture of exhaustion from solo parenting, and challenging two and four-year-old behaviour. Even Hubs’ patience is being tested and that guy is a saint! So I know it’s not just me.

But I know it won’t last forever. This behaviour is a time of learning, and with the right direction and encouragement, the kids will continue to thrive. I just need to continue with my deep breathing, and let a few things through to the keeper. I don’t have to connect with every delivery.

So in keeping with this theme, it’s 30 degrees today, and I’m about to walk to and from Chanbe’s kindy for the third time today. The first time was at 8:30am for drop-off and by the time I got home (pushing our huge pram uphill all the way) I was dripping with sweat, but I felt good. Then I walked back at 10am for the Mothers Day morning tea that they hosted and home again, and now I’ll be heading back again for pick-up. It’s okay to be uncomfortable, and it’s feeling better and better every day.

Add New Post

May 1, 2015 / Renae / Leave a comment

I’ve tried to “add new post” about 5 times in the last week, and each time it has ended the same way – me closing my dashboard without having written a word. I think I’m suffering from a severe case of comparisonitis. I keep reading other blogs thinking “I wish I could write like that” or “I wish I could parent like that” or “I wish I could interior decorate like that.” It’s getting me nowhere.

I feel like I’m being really boring at the moment. I don’t have a lot going on that’s just for me, or for the purpose of growth and development. Oh sure I have ideas, but there’s just not a lot of action. My 101 in 1001 has been neglected for months now, and there are definitely some items that will be impossible to complete, like the ones that require me to do something for a whole year. Oh and go to South Africa. That is pretty unlikely. But I guess you never know!

One thing I have been doing almost every day is walking, and gosh it feels good. I even threw in a bit of jogging the other night, and it was much easier than I expected.

We are talking a lot about what we want to do with our house which is very exciting and lovely, but again, it’s just all talk at the moment. Once we have plans drawn up and an idea of what is happening when, it will all be a bit more real.

Hmmm what else. Oh yeah. I’m sick of talking about kid stuff to other mums. Like, seriously. I don’t have anyone up here (yet) who I can just shoot the breeze with. At playgroup it’s all “my kid does this” and “my kid started walking at this age” and “have you started Darby on solids” and “gosh my nipples are sore” and “gosh I’m tired” and “my kid doesn’t sleep through” and yadda yadda yadda. I think I just don’t like all the superficial small talk. I’ve said it all before to so many different people, that I just can’t find the energy to participate in conversations about the mundane. I want to talk about things other than my kids, though I realise that may be tricky at a playgroup.

The kids seem to have no understanding of my personal space at the moment. Absolutely none. My body is their playground and as much as I love a good snuggle and a little wrestle, I’ve been prodded, poked, stood on, slobbered on and kicked in more places than I care to list. I love my kids. No, I love my kids. I just need some quiet time during the day to recharge. That’s where the walking has been great.

I’ve just sent Hubs and the kids out on a mission to pick up a few things for the house, so I can potter around (read: have a shower) in peace and quiet.

Although, Darbs is having a little nap. Maybe I should join him…

Another update

February 23, 2015 / Renae / Leave a comment

We’re in Brisbane.

Mum and the kids and I flew down this evening. Hubs suggested it and i agreed. He and Darby and I are flying to Melbourne this weekend for a wedding so there wasn’t much point in hanging around up there when the was no power.

He is staying with another Doctor we have been friendly with this last month, as he had electricity, being on the same grid as the hospital. We are so grateful for him opening his place to us – we’ve been hanging out there the last 2 days enjoying the air con.

It’s been rather hot up there…

This is me after busting my arse all day yesterday with Dad, getting all of our stuff out of the temp house.

We can’t move in to our new place til the floors are finished and they can’t finish the floors until the electricity is back on!

It’s all very amusing. So if you’re in Brizzie and want to catch up I’ll be here all week. Try the beef. It’s from Rockhampton.

Cyclone Marcia

February 20, 2015 / Renae / 1 Comment

Marcia Marcia Marcia.

I’m sure no one else on the Internet has written that today. I’m so funny. As some of you may be aware, we recently moved to Rockhampton, and in turn moved directly into the path of a Category 5 cyclone. Woops! We also bought a 65 year old house with the contract settling 2 days ago. We figure it’s lasted 65 years and numerous storms, surely this one won’t knock it over! Maybe we should have settled next week!

The temporary house we are in has a rather leaky roof and is in a very low lying area. It is high set but I’m a little nervous about the few pieces of furniture we have bought from garage sales that we’re storing under the house. That part isn’t built in.

Anyway we’ve done what we can and now we wait. Apparently Yeppoon is getting hit pretty badly right now. Before we moved here, a number of people said “don’t live in Rocky, live in Yeppoon. It’s much nicer out there.” I’m kind of glad we didn’t listen 🙂

Apart from the whole “cyclone” thing we are doing really well! Mum and Dad have been up here for a week and we had a little party for Quinn’s 2nd birthday last weekend which was lovely.

We’ve also had some work done on the floors of our new place in preparation for us moving in. Here’s the last couple of weeks in photos!

I got another haircut!

The kids helped me make gnocchi

Quinn chose this bag to take with her to kindy drop off which amused Chance’s teachers and the other parents.

I made Quindy a froggie cake for her birthday

Which she ate happily

Ouma came up for some lovely cuddles

There’s been a lot of this going on

We removed all the carpet from our new place in preparation for getting them polished

So far they’ve gone from this:

To this after sanding. I know, right????

Darby-doo had his 10 week check last week and weighed in at a healthy (whopping!) 7.3kg. He is doing marvelously and even letting me sleep most of the night!

And then there’s the cyclone.

So that’s us up to date for now. I’m a little excited that this is my first cyclone which I know is morbid and I’ll probably feel very differently in a few hours but for now the novelty is there.

I’ll try and do an update in the next few days!

Rocky rocks

January 25, 2015 / Renae / Leave a comment

Okay so it’s not exactly the most original title, but I’m sleep deprived and have had a (rather generous) glass of bubbly so it’s the best I can come up with right now.

It’s been a good first week. We arrived last Monday just after midday and it was an absolutely stinking hot day, but I dare not complain. We drove to the hospital to pick up the keys for our temp accommodation and while Hubs went to do that, I took the kids to the cafe and bought 2 huge bottles of water. It was at this point that both Quindy and Darbs decided to fill their respective nappies. I bundled them up and found the baby change room and took a look at myself in the mirror. Yikes. I was extremely glad I had decided not to meet Hubs’ colleagues that day. My hair was dripping wet and I I didn’t have sweat patches – I had dry patches, and very few of them let me tell you.

Anyway we arrived at the accommodation and were pleasantly surprised. It’s a 3 bedroom house and although it’s on the main highway through town and is a bit of a hike from the hospital, we are grateful for the space, the air con in every room, and the luscious, green grassy yard!

We spent that afternoon and the next day looking at rentals, and even a couple of houses for sale. Hubs started work on Wednesday and I took the kids to the lovely big shopping centre. We had a 100% successful trip and I was particularly impressed with the parent rooms there! I arrived home feeling very confident that this year is going to be a good one. The next 2 days were equally great with the kids and after exploring the beautiful botanical gardens this arvo, I know that there will always be things to do with the kids here.

We have a couple of things brewing in regards to housing but I’ll share more when we know more which will hopefully be very very soon!

Feeling the festive love

December 29, 2014 / Renae / Leave a comment

Sorry that I’ve been missing since Christmas. I’ve been in a cycle of broken sleep, girly in-home movie nights with my friend, baking, constantly checking realestate.com for houses in Rocky, checking flights every day to see if they are going up in price as I’m yet to book anything and we might be leaving as early as next week, all the while thinking “I should blog”.

Our Christmas day was lovely. It didn’t exactly feel like Christmas but our little orphans Christmas was very nice and included a swimming pool so that was a bonus.

This is the love I’m feeling at the moment:

To be honest I didn’t really expect to get many Christmas or “new baby boy” cards and I really appreciate all the love that has been sent. It makes us feel closer than the nearly 2000 km away from Brisbane that we are.

Hubs is back at work after almost 3 weeks paternity leave and he finishes up here in 2 weeks. He then starts in Rocky on the 21st Jan – a bit earlier than we initially planned but we’re happy about that. I’ve been going around in circles trying to decide the best plan of action for us to get to Rocky and still haven’t come up with anything concrete. There are just too many options and they all have their good and bad points. One thing that’s making life easier is that the weather has been rather lovely since Christmas day. Lovely cool breezes during the day and very comfortable temps over night. I haven’t put the air con on since Christmas eve!

The kids are doing well. Darby is feeding nicely and packing on the weight and is even sleeping in 3 hour blocks over night! Chance keeps asking if we’re “moving to Rockhampton today” and Quinn is learning to use the potty! Is all happening here!

Now all we need is a house 🙂

Happy 7th Anniversary (and Happy Due Date!)

December 1, 2014 / Renae / 2 Comments

Dear Hubs,

I love you. Very few days, if any, go by where you don’t somehow make me smile.

We have been talking a bit lately about how much we have both changed in the last 8 years. Some changes have been intentional, some not so much. Some positive, some still need refining.

At the end of the day, I know we are in this together. We are a team and we have everything at our disposal to keep our marriage going the direction we want it to. Even though it won’t all be rainbows and unicorns all of the time, the hard stuff makes the good stuff even better, and there’s plenty of that to speak of.

On this day 7 years ago,

I made vows to love you and cherish you forever. It’s hard to imagine what “forever” means on your wedding day. Even 7 years isn’t actually that long, but it still excites me that I found you; that I found a man who I do want to share life’s special moments with, as well as the day-to-day mundane that fills the gaps. With you, there is always some new idea and adventure to talk about; always dreams to be dreamt and plans to be made.

Don’t stop dreaming with me; don’t stop getting excited about ideas; don’t stop sharing those ideas, no matter how crazy.

Don’t stop believing (hold on to that feeling) (I don’t love Journey)

Love, Wifey xx

Sharing’s caring

October 9, 2014 / Renae / Leave a comment

Or can be more easily defined as “being a parent.”

Thinking about having offspring? You’d better be good at sharing. Everything. Your glass of water; your sneakie cookie; your sandwich; your bed; your lap; your phone; your clothes; pretty much every meal and snack and drink (aside from coffee and wine) you make for yourself, for the next 2 decades.

It’s not that I mind sharing. I’m pretty good at it. But sometimes I just want to say NO! Chanbe and Quindy are very much at the “learning to share” phase, and it’s a bit hard, when trying to teach them to share with each other and other kids, to not set the example. We do, however, believe in the idea that you don’t always have to share. It’s a choice, and you are allowed to say no, as long as you realise that the other person has the same option when you’re the one doing the asking.

So today, I said “no” to sharing my cookie. I wanted to dip that whole sucker into my hot cup of coffee and not have to go halves with any little people, especially since they had just had their own. This is sometimes met with tantrums, but it’s a guilt-free no on my behalf.

This was just a little “share” from me while I drink my 1/4 glass of rose while the kids are having screen time and I prepare mentally and physically for the “dinner, bath, bedtime” that I’ll be doing pretty much solo for the next 12 days. Hubs is working non-stop until we go on our little holiday, so I need the mental prep time around 5pm each day to tackle the next 2 hours.

Coming up on the blog:

The next step in my quest for making the perfect macarons
Our holiday plans
My unremarkable pregnancy (and why that is a good thing)
We love going on bumpy drives

… and more! Stay tuned…

One of those shopping trips

August 26, 2014 / Renae / Leave a comment

You know the one. The 3-going-on-4-year-old wanting everything he sees and throwing a massive tantrum in the middle of the 5pm rush; the 18-month-old voicing her displeasure over the load in her nappy the size of Texas; the looks of pity and acknowledgment and “ah yes I’ve been there” from fellow parents and onlookers.

Yesterday I did not have that shopping trip. Yesterday I was grateful, for so many things.

It was just after 4pm when I put Quindy into the pram and set off to pick Chanbe up from kindy. I planned to pop to the dodgy Woolies which is just around the corner from where we live after picking Chanbe up, to get a few necessities, depending on how long the kids remained happy once we arrived. It was a lovely walk to the shop – about 1km – and the kids were happily chatting away.

We went through the shopping rules again, as we always do, and as I heard Chanbe say “no asking for food, no asking for drinks, no asking for toys” I praised him, only to be told “no Mama, I’m telling Quinny.” More praise.

We arrived and Chanbe immediately wanted to get out of the pram and help me shop. I took a breath and decided that this could work. He put his shoes on (no kid of mine is going to be walking around the Bronx Woolies barefoot) and we put the basket in his seat. The next 20 or so minutes were bliss. I would point to the item on the shelf, he would pick it up, give it to Quindy, and instruct her to put it in the basket. I ended up doing a slightly bigger shop than I had planned, simply because it went so well.

When we went to the checkouts, Chanbe wanted to show me the toy section. Here we go, I thought. But I said to him that it would be lovely for him to show me and then we would have to go and pay for our shopping. He pointed out a few things and that was it. Another sigh of relief and more praise for good choices.

I pushed our ginormous pram through the checkouts, paid for the shopping, gave the kids an apple each, and we were on our way.

This is how $60 of shopping fits nicely in the pram:

On the walk home, I thought about how grateful I was to have had such a positive experience. Parenting is hard work sometimes, and I know that I can get overwhelmed and bogged down by the monotony and challenges that this job brings. But yesterday, I chose to be grateful.

I’m grateful that I have 2 wonderful, healthy children who make me smile and make me proud.

I’m grateful for our awesome pram that I was a bit hesitant about buying initially, but that I haven’t regretted once. We get comments on it every time we go out which makes me love it more.

I’m grateful for this beautiful weather we are having. I struggled a lot with the summer months up here, but the last couple of weeks we’ve had lovely cool nights and beautiful days. The sun isn’t too hot, and there has been a nice stiff breeze to keep the flies away.

I’m grateful that I never have to worry about money to buy food and to pay for living costs.

I’m grateful for my fully-functioning, albeit slightly slow and sluggish body.

I’m grateful that even though I’m experiencing some not so fun ligament pain, I can get out and exercise which is so good for me at the moment.

I’m grateful that I have a loving husband who has a good job that enables me to be at home with the kids.

I could go on, but you get the idea. How can I not be grateful when I have all of this;

… and more:

Wifey: 26 weeks with #3

Leaving “home” to come “home”

March 23, 2014 / Renae / 6 Comments

Hubs and I left Brisbane and moved to Melbourne in June 2008, just before I started this blog actually. Every place we lived in from then on, I seemed to prefer to Brisbane. Melbourne had amazing coffee and beautiful food, the public transport was incredible, and Hubs and I were newlyweds living in an exciting town, exploring it together. Wangaratta was a nice change of pace and it was where our little Chanbe was born. Mount Beauty was, well absolutely beautiful, and we met some lovely people there.

In the time we lived in Victoria, whenever we visited Brisbane, I always complained about how bad the traffic was getting, and I was generally excited to get back “home” (ie wherever we were living at the time).

I wrestled with so many emotions during my trip to Brisbane in the last fortnight. It brought up feelings in me that I hadn’t felt about the city in a long time. I was homesick for my hometown. I miss my friends who have made so much effort in the last six years to keep in touch and to catch up when I’m in town. And my family. I miss my family so much.

I miss the city I grew up in.

As I was driving to West End on the second day of my trip to meet up with a friend for some yoga (and wine) (together!) (Best. Yoga. Ever!!) I went through the northern suburbs where I attended church and youth group, and later became a youth group leader; I passed friends houses I used to drive to for Melrose nights back in the 90s; I drove the familiar route from Aspley to Kelvin Grove, and reminisced about all I had been through in those streets and suburbs. I drove past my old primary school, high school and uni (all in the same block) and through the city where many a fun night was had with my gal pals.

I had come home. And it hurt that it was only going to be for a short time.

Of course my home is where my Hubs and family are, but I just wish that physical place was Brisbane at the moment. I’ve kind of touched on how I’m finding it a bit tough up here, but it runs much deeper than that. I know it’s early days, and things might turn around, but Hubs and I are wondering if we made the right choice moving out here. Hubs has had a few disappointments at work which has taken away from his enjoyment of the job, and I am really struggling in our very small house with no yard. And there’s really not much to do here with the kids in the afternoons. It’s a question of “do we go to the lake, to the family fun park, or the pool?”

And it’s so hot. So so so hot.

Hubs and I are already talking about where we want to move to next year and the list just keeps growing! So far we have discussed Cairns, Perth, Broome, Melbourne, Ingham, Brisbane, Bundaberg and even South Africa! Hubs and I have come to the realisation that the “place” we move to isn’t going to make us happy, instead it’s our attitude and feelings towards our life that will determine our happiness. We know we have to stop looking outwards at things and places for happiness, and start looking within. Which means regardless of how we feel about being in Mount Isa, we can be happy here too.

It just might take a bit more effort than we thought. Now. It’s Sunday afternoon. We went to the lake this morning, and the pool is closed, so it looks like it’s off to the family fun park!