But it’s so hard.

I’ve left Hubs to finish everything off up in Rocky and I know he is capable but it’s so shite when you’re on your own.

Our ensuite as it turns out has some issues and is leaking through the floor so the tiles have had to be ripped up and are hopefully in the process of being replaced.

We just had thousands of dollars of electrical work done including a new a/c installed. I just got the bill today. I hope he has a 12 month payment plan because ouch.

I had an abysmal day looking, or should I say not looking at houses. I got cancelled on three times and got the shits and left.

I’m trying not to feel sorry for myself. I know these are all first world problems. I just need a break from thinking about the hundred things to do. I’m slowly making my way through my to do list and I know deep down it will work out. The process is just sucking at the moment. In a big way.

At least I have my gorgeous kids to remind me that life is good. Not to mention wonderful parents and family and the absolute best husband. Seriously. The best. And I miss him like crazy right now.

Where you ask? In the “oh my gosh this sucks” stage of packing.

I remember it well in Wangaratta, a little bit in Townsville, (more here) and I avoided it entirely in Mount Isa as we got packers in. Which was awesome.

But here I am. I have a sad bubba  (virus? Teeth? Nothing??) And am surrounded by boxes and memories and a looming garage sale on tomorrow from 7am.

And I’m just so done.

The wonderful Kate arrives tonight to do some serious baby cuddling for the weekend and then will drive to Brisbane with me and Darby and Julius on Monday.

So much going on between now and then. I know I’ll get there but right now, I have no idea how.

Gosh it’s hard to downsize.

I think if Oprah came and pulled out all our belongings in our house and placed them out on tables I would be quite shocked. But I don’t think we have a ridiculous amount of stuff.

Others would disagree.

Did you know that the average household contains 300,000 items? Hubs told me that. I don’t know where he got his figure from and I didn’t fact check him so it could be completely made up. But can you imagine that??

I mean I have about 200 rubber bands. Does that count as 200 items? And what about my Bobby pin collection?

It’s like saying that the Thermomix comes with a recipe book with hundreds of recipes. But 72 of them are just different types of risotto.

Sorry. Had to be done.

Anyway we are doing our best. We are taking photos of things we can’t decide on. It’s helping.

Chance and Quinn went to Brisbane with mum and dad today. They have arrived safe and sound and I’m falling asleep.

See you tomorrow for more boxing.

Dammit. I just realised a missed my “10 things on the 10th” for December. In fairness I did do one on the 1st of December. It might have to do.

I think if I only had two days and all the packing supplies, I could pack the house up in that time. The thing is I know I have another 5 days, and I’ll probably use that whole time.

I’m loving putting things aside for the garage sale. It’s going to be more work but I think I’m being more ruthless with our stuff which means fewer things to pack!

To be honest, packing up the house is only causing about 50% of my stress at the moment. The rest of it revolves around renting this house out and finding one to live in and all the paperwork that entails!

Not that you can tell I’m stressed. Dad commented on how calm I seemed considering the upcoming move. And I guess I am calm. Either that or I’m too damn tired to be stressed.

Either way more boxes have been packed and tomorrow the kids will head to Brisbane with Gran and Grumpy. And you know what I’ll be doing?

Nope! More packing…

I mused to Hubs the other day that our life provides many “Sliding Doors“* moments where our decisions can, and do, completely alter the direction and immediate outcomes of our lives. Most people’s sliding doors moments come from external sources; new neighbours, new people at work; new schools to attend; and these things generally won’t impact on their whole lives, just an aspect.

I’m referring mainly to our moving from place to place so often.  When we move, we move. Since Hubs and I were married, we have lived in the following places, in order:

Brisbane
Melbourne
Wangaratta
Mount Beauty
Back to Wangaratta
Townsville
Ingham
Mount Isa
Rockhampton

I look back at the friendships we have formed over the years, due to our moving around so much, and it makes me ponder over two things in particular. Firstly I can’t imagine our lives without the people we met and befriended in all the above places. I just can’t. We still holiday together; we keep in touch by phone and letter and email and fb; they are the Godparents for our children; they were there in the early years of our marriage, and when we first got pregnant and had our first baby; they were not just our substitute family and friends after leaving everyone behind in Brisbane – they were and are so much more than that and I simply cannot fathom how we could possibly exist without them in our lives.

The second thing I wonder is twofold. Who will we meet next, and who will we never get to meet? There are so many good people out there, and I know that we can’t be friends with everyone, and it really makes me believe that the people we have met along the way are truly meant to be a part of our lives. I sometimes get frustrated with our dodgy old house and how much these renovations are costing us and is it really worth it and maybe we should have bought somewhere else or just rented. But then I think of our neighbours and the impact they have had on our life here and I don’t regret buying this “renovators delight” for a second. We never would have met some of them, and certainly would never have had the relationship we have with them, if they didn’t all live right across the road from us.

Rockhampton really was a random move for us. The job was supposed to be available from August, and being so damn miserable in Mount Isa, I told Hubs we should take it. I honestly wouldn’t have cared where it was (okay, within reason) I just needed to leave the Isa. But then we found out he wouldn’t be able to start until January. It was still a great job opportunity so he still accepted it, but in hindsight, we could have gone to a number of different places. And honestly, it’s been one of the best moves for me in so far as friendships and support networks.

When I was deciding about whether or not to have another baby, (Hubs was already on board, just waiting for me to come to my senses) I told him that if we were to go down that path, we would either have to move back to Brisbane or stay here for another year.

So here we are. We are almost definitely going to be moving at the end of this year, so I am making the most of my village while I have it. And who knows who will be on the either side of the next lot of sliding doors.

*I bloody love this movie. The premise, the execution, the actors. It still gets me thinking, nearly 20 years later!