I love my kids. I love My Hubs. Life is exhausting and chaotic and messy and I wonder if it will ever be different or easier; I wonder if my house will ever be tidy, but it’s where we’re at right now and we’re in it together, me and Hubs. And that’s all that matters.
Our attempts at a family photo. Chance was not interested…
Happy birthday to the perfect man for me. You are an amazing partner and a fabulous Dadda. Love you honey xxx
Two of your favourite things in one xx
To the bastards who tried to steal stuff from under our house last night,
How dare you. How dare you come into our home and help yourself to what isn’t yours.
How dare you fill me with fear and dread in my own home.
How dare you ruin the wonderful night out we had just been on to kick off Hubs’ birthday week.
Every noise I hear, my heart skips a beat and I want to run to the kids room to check on them.
How dare you make me worry about my kids even more than I already do, every second of every day.
How dare you make me feel like I need to lock my windows and deadbolt the doors.
How dare you make me feel like I want to move out of my own house.
Just how dare you.
Wifey
It’s been slow and glorious with Hubs around for the last three weeks and Mum before that. We are soaking up all the goodness. My little super hero.
We had quite a crowd of friends over today to officially welcome him (show day holiday up here) and wet his head. Brunch turned into lunch which turned into afternoon drinks which turned into dinner for the kids and us saying goodbye to the last people around 7pm. Just the kind of day we love.
I’m not going to lie. I was a little nervous about my first afternoon and evening flying solo. But as Hubs left for work at 3:20pm and wished me luck, I said “aaaaah it’s only 4 hours til bed time!” And that actually made me feel better!
Thankfully Jules is a pretty cruisey baby, but there were a few times where there was a lot going on and he would start up as well. He’s pretty easily pleased (cuddles and boob) so we made it through without too much drama.
We even got crafty!
Dinner went well with all three of them liking and eating their tacos, and bath time was smooth easy too. Julius wanted to be part of story time so I had all four of them listening in. I wish I had a photo of that. It felt nice.
I made sure I was taking a lot of mindful deep breaths and using a calm voice when things got a little hairy. If I felt myself getting worked up I was able to walk away for a minute to regroup. I was pretty proud of this, as today I wasn’t so in control of my emotions. But I guess when you have backup in the form of your husband, you can lose your sh*t a bit and know he will be there to help pick up the pieces. When you’re flying solo, you just gotta deal.
And since I had a hot dinner sitting on my lap and a glass of wine poured by 7:45pm I think I dealt pretty well.
Four kids? No worries.
Random edition
1. Quinn spilled some of her chocolate ice cream on her foot last night while watching our Friday night movie. I thought I had cleaned it all up. This morning the kids were running around and she scraped her foot and insisted it was bleeding and that she needed a band-aid. I was busy with Julius and (knowing it wasn’t serious by the lack of screaming and “the tone”) I asked Chance to get the band-aid she was asking for. When I went in a few minutes later, I saw that the “blood” was actually the “chocolate ice cream” from last night. She was adamant. I let her put her two band-aids on and called it a win.
2. We were chatting to our neighbour who has some time off next week and was trying to decide where to travel to. We suggested a few places, when Hubs chimed it. “You know what the best holiday I’ve had in the last five years has been?” A few things sprang to mind for me – the week in Melbs without the kids being at the top of my list. His answer? “The last two weeks here at home.” I almost burst. It was just the loveliest thing to hear.
3. I don’t want Hubs to go back to work, like ever. I can honestly say that the last two weeks have, in fact, been two of the best weeks of our family life. He has been his usual superstar Dadness, doing the school run every morning and afternoon, parenting Quinn and Darby for the rest of the day, taking the kids to the playground after school, and just generally doing anything and everything I ask of him. I know that in the first few weeks of having a baby that a lot of Dads are “expected” to do these things, and maybe it’s nothing special, but honestly it’s times like these that I know I chose the right man to spend my life with. And look, of course he has driven me absolutely crazy at times with his ways of doing things, but that’s life isn’t it!? I know I have driven him equally crazy, but at the end of every day, there are cuddles and kisses and loving words, and that’s what matters the most.
4. The phrase “Mama we need you” is never a good thing for me to hear.
5. I really want to grow herbs but I know that my laziness and apathy towards any kind of plant-related matters will always be my downfall.
6. Darby’s toilet training is going surprisingly and exceptionally well. We have been nappy-free (except for nap and sleep time) for a week with only one accident. Compared to Chance’s toilet-training experience, (aka disaster on my part) the thought of which brings a twitch to my eye, this is a breeze. Fingers crossed!
Captain Underpants in all his glory, with two of his “poo toys” (Gups from Octonauts)
7. It’s getting “cold” up here. Ha ha ha.
8. Chance had told me that it was “dress like a Pirate day” at school on Friday, but it wasn’t until 11:30am on Friday that I saw the email (from the day before) reminding me about it. He hadn’t dressed like a pirate and I felt really bad that I hadn’t remembered. So I decided to take his pirate shirt in, and “be his hero” (inspired by this post from Kelly at Be a Fun Mum) and the smile on his face was totally worth it.
Don’t have a photo of pirate day, but here’s a cute photo of Chance and Darby playing the “cuddle game”.
9. People without kids just don’t get what it’s like to have kids, and that is okay. It’s really okay. I’ve finally come to a place of peace about that. I know I didn’t get it until we had Chance, even though I thought I would understand, and I don’t know what it’s like to parent a teenager (yet), even though I have kids of my own. I guess it’s true of any life circumstances; until you experience it first hand, it’s hard to know exactly what it’s like.
10. Aaaaaaaaaah my baby Julius. I am so in love with this little man. I said to Hubs the other day that I wondered if it would still be such a big deal for me when it’s baby number four, and it just totally is. I cannot get enough of his little face and tiny feet and baby hands and lamby-cry. I am just so bat-shit crazy in love with him. I stare at him and wonder; will he be like either of his brothers, who are so incredibly different from each other? Will he be like his sister? His Dadda? What will he pick up from me? Or will he just be completely different from all of us? I’m just in awe of this gorgeous little beauty that Hubs and I brought into the world. It’s nice to feel that feeling all over again, I have to say.
I “should” just do whatever I want; whatever makes me happy; everyone else be damned.
Okay so that may be overstating the fact a little, but I made a choice today that my former self would not have. I decided to stay home and hang out with Darby instead of going to the indoor play area. I know he would have loved it but being in the middle of toilet training at the moment, and having Jules with me as well, I just didn’t have the mental or physical energy for it today.
So we just hung out. While Julius slept, we read stories, drank cups of tea, and he did all of his business on the toilet!!!! It was such a lovely morning with him and we just don’t get to have much time together where I’m not racing about trying to get things done.
I made the decision to just be with him today and it was the best.
Cheers little man. You are freaking delightful!
Poor Julius. He is such the 4th child…
Hubs’ mum came up for the weekend for a grandkid fix and new baby snuggles. It’s always lovely having family around and the kids had a great time. There was a lot of this action…
We headed out to the Heritage Village yesterday for their open day and saw lots of cool stuff.
I think Hubs is quietly suggesting that we’d had enough fire engine bell…
There was also a bit of sitting around drinking coffee and wine and eating good food with good company. My favourite kind of weekend!
Thanks for visiting, Ouma!
It’s taken me four babies to finally realise something.
No one is to blame, but the words people use have a powerful and lasting effect on a first-time mum.
When I was pregnant with Chance, and shortly after he was born, I was warned about the first six weeks. And then the following six weeks.
I was pretty much told the first 12 weeks, or the “4th trimester” as it’s sometimes referred to, are really hard work, and I just had to “get through” that time and things will get easier after that.
I’m here to tell you that this time around, I’m not just getting through those first 12 weeks. Because my goodness they are 12 of the most precious weeks to experience and savour in a baby’s life.
There were so many times with Chance and Quinn in particular that I just knuckled down and pushed through without stopping and realising how much I adore the newborn infant baby phase. Like seriously, I can’t get enough of this.
Look at that face. My beautiful Julius Becker is one week old today. It’s nothing and it’s everything. He is already such a huge part of our lives and has taken over our hearts.
So yes, the nights are interrupted by feeds, but also full of cuddles and snuggles. This is just a season of his life and I intend to savour every moment of it.
We welcomed Julius (middle name TBA) to the family at 6pm 18th May. 4.31kg (9lb8oz) feeding beautifully. He’s perfect.
