Category: The Spirit

This time last year…

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… I was blogging about how lovely and quiet the college is without all those pesky students around
… I was amazed that we had been in Melbourne for 6 months already
… I was struggling to find an identity for myself down here
… We had just celebrated our 1st wedding anniversary
… I was annoyed that I was sick AGAIN!!
… I was looking forward to going to Brisbane for Christmas

And now I’m
… blogging about what I was doing a year ago
… blown away we’ve been in Melbourne for 18 months
… finding my groove down here as a wife, a Marriage Celebrant, a friend and someone who has had a job for over a year and is happy in it
… excited to have just celebrated our 2nd wedding anniversary
… excited that I haven’t been sick for months and months (touch wood)
… looking forward to going to Brisbane for Christmas, and all the adventures to follow

The countdown is on! 2 weeks and 1.5 days of work left and we’re hitting the road! YEAH!!!

A priveleged childhood had I

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I consider myself to be a very lucky person, growing up in a loving family in a beautiful home and never going without everything I needed, and many things I wanted. With Dad being a geologist, we got to do a lot of travelling around for the first 7 or so years of my life. We would spend the winter months up in Dimbulah (I can’t believe it has it’s own Wiki page! Woo hoo!) just outside of the township, where my bro and I would go to kindergarten, pre-school or school. We lived at a Queensland Government base camp, where up to 30 male geologists and maybe 1 or 2 female geologists or field hands were based for 6 months at a time. There were a number of tents set up as accommodation, and some outhouses and outdoor showers to share.

We were lucky though. We had “the shed”. As a kid, it was like living in a big adventure land. Our “back yard” was a mountain of boulders that we would climb up and explore; “The Shed” seemed perfectly adequate and large to a 4 or 5 or 6-year-old; and because we were usually the only kids on site, we were given a lot of treats, usually in the form of soft drinks or cardboard-on-a-rope rides, or piggy-back rides. Mum was the camp cook, often cooking for the whole camp of 30 men, with my brother and I, and our dog Cuddles, running around under her feet.

I re-visited our old home when I was 22 and boy that shed was small. Mum, how did you do it?? Living there with Dad and us 2 ratbags, I have nothing but admiration for you!

Even writing this now, at the age of 20…something… I have a smile on my face. Those times up there for our family are some of the happiest memories of my childhood, and certainly at my youngest, some of the only memories I have. Yes, my life is awesome.

It’s not you, it’s me.

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“Often the things that annoy you in others, are things you see in yourself.”

I have NO idea where I first read that, but I totally related to it then, and I have ever since.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. For some reason, my patience has been a bit light-on for a while now, and I’ve been finding myself getting annoyed at things that wouldn’t normally annoy me, and then getting annoyed at myself, for being annoyed. And that is really annoying!!

To try and combat this, I’ve been trying to work out exactly what is annoying me in a situation, and reasoning with myself: Is this worth getting frustrated over? Is the issue, in fact, my own? Am I getting annoyed at this person, or the behaviour? Would I act the same way if I were in their shoes?

This line of reasoning sometimes helps (if, in fact, I remember to do it and not just get carried away with my feelings and thoughts and get upset and annoyed and frustrated and…. where was I?…) and I feel I am reconnecting with my patient self. Then today I stumbled across this quote:

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” (Carl Jung)

And I like this idea a LOT more. It takes away the feeling of frustration, at both the person for being annoying, and at myself for feeling like I have the same character trait that is annoying me in the first place. Instead, it gives me the suggestion to get to know myself better, and to understand who Wifey really is. And she’s not such a bad gal.

I told you! This journey of self-discovery is going to be a lonnnnnnnnnnnng one.

A matter of life and death

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I’ve contemplated writing this post for the last year or so, but have never quite gotten around to it. The views expressed in this post are of myself and many people I know. By “we” I refer to many many people in general, but I realise that not everyone feels this way.

Firstly I want to talk about life. New life in fact. Babies, if you will. What is it that “we” find so fascinating about babies? What makes “us” go ga-ga over them? They’re everywhere! I see babies almost every day being pushed or carried around by their Mum or Dad (or their nanny in New York!) and every time I see one, I go all gooey inside. Now before you blame my biological clock (tick tock tick tock), I have to point out 2 things:

1. I’ve ALWAYS been like this
2. I’m not the only one who starts pulling funny faces whenever there’s a baby around


4.3 new babies are born every second!! Babies are common. And I don’t mean in the chav sense of the word, I just mean they are a dime a dozen, yet every baby is a miracle and something to be in awe of. “We” will never get over the wonder that is the warm bundle of goodness wrapped up in a blanket. *sigh*

And then there’s the other end of a life. Death. Again, death is so common. Around 2 people die every second of every day. As my Dad says, “Death is a part of life.” People go through stages of grief that are often unbearable. I can’t imagine this level of grief, but I know that sooner or later, I’ll have to deal with it. I have known people who have died and I have bawled my eyes out at their funeral. I know a lot of these tears have been for their families – a lot of my grief in these instances has been out of empathy for their loved ones left behind. But I also believe in a life after this one, which brings comfort in the midst of the heartache.

I feel I am categorically ill-equipped and unqualified to speak with any level of authority, on such life-changing experiences, even though I have witnessed a birth (the second most amazing thing I’ve ever experienced. The first being the commitment I made to Hubs on our wedding day) and have grieved over death. It’s just one of those things I find fascinating. We are mesmerised by birth and can be broken by death. We are captivated by the face of a newborn, and can be scarred for life by the death of a loved one.

We rejoice in the start of a new life, and I like to think we can rejoice in a celebration of a life that has ended.

Wanting to be Mary

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I had a flashback the other day about being at pre-school as Christmas approached. We were, as usual, putting on a nativity play, and as the parts were being selected, I was hoping to be Mary. The angels got cast first (Billy Bob’s Mum was one of them) and I was selected, but I turned it down. I was hanging out for the big one. Once the angels were all selected, they went on to the animals and “extras”. They must have chosen Mary and Joseph next, and I was overlooked. I have no idea how disappointed I was about this, but I can tell you, I was even more disappointed to find out that the only parts left were the 3 wise men. So I got stuck with being a man. I remember this was a little upsetting, but Mum made me feel better somehow and I ended up having a blast. I can’t remember what gift I was carrying for Baby Jesus, but I like to think I held the gold…

It’s a learning curve

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Hubs and I have been married just over 1 year now and there are a few things I’ve learnt along the way. Some things I’ve worked out for myself, some things have been taught by Hubs, and there have been some pearls of wisdom shared by people in the know along the way. Here are a few I’d like to share with you:

1. Pick your battles. This is one I’ve learnt via all 3 of the above ways. I used to fight all of the little disagreements that we had, and realised it got me nowhere.

2. One of the best, most important and most appreciated gifts I can give Hubs is my undivided attention. Even if it’s for 5 minutes in the morning before I head to work, it makes him feel like the most important person in my world and starts our day wonderfully.

3. Respect for each other’s differences. Just respect in general really, but Hubs and I are quite different in a lot of ways, which sometimes means we don’t understand where the other is coming from. I’ve learnt (the hard way) to take a step back and try and see things from his perspective. And if I can’t, I’ve realised that’s okay.

4. Safety first. Hubs has created in our marriage, an assurance that we are safe together. And I don’t mean physically, I mean emotionally. There is nothing that I’m afraid of telling him. I know that no matter what I say, no matter how crazy, unrealistic, irrational, no matter what, Hubs will listen and not judge me. I know that I can share all of my hopes and dreams and disappointments and fears and craziness with him, and he will not only embrace it all, he’ll love me even more for it. I hope I do the same for him, though my impulsive tendencies sometimes get in the way, but I’m learning! Which brings me to my next point:

5. Take a deep breath and don’t react to situations/comments/actions straight away. This one I’m learning from Hubs. There have been quite a few times in our relationship when I have reacted without considering intentions/motivations (not just Hubs’) behind things, and more often than not there has been a misunderstanding and I end up looking and feeling slightly foolish.

So that’s about all for now. I could go on and on but I don’t want to share all my wisdom in one sitting! What a journey it has been so far, and what an adventure our life together will be!

And here’s some photos, cos you know, everybody likes photos!!

Hubs and I on our honeymoon in Vanuatu with our hair braided (my scalp got SO sunburnt!!)

A week later when we took the plaits out:

Fires in Victoria

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I know I kind of joked about how hot it was a couple of weeks ago, and how everyone was complaining. Well, we don’t have much to complain about compared to these people. A lot of you may have seen the coverage on the news. It’s just horrific. Saturday’s temps got up to about 46 degrees and we pretty much had to grin and bear it, but as bad as it was in town, nothing could compare to the destruction that was going on less than 100km away.

Spare a thought and a prayer for these people. I pray that all the fires are controlled soon and nobody else loses their life. Good luck Victoria. xxx

Mt Tibrogargan

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I do believe this is my 100th post! Hooray!

I thought I would celebrate this milestone with a post about another achievement I made whilst holidaying in Brisbane. My 2007/2008 New Year’s resolution was to try a few new things. So I dreaded Hubs’ hair, started sewing again, did some study, and climbed Mt Tibrogargan! (The Gorilla-looking mountain on the way to the Sunny Coast.) I wasn’t sure what to expect to be honest. I thought we were going for a bushwalk/hike, but it felt like more of a climb/scamper!

My sister-in-law used to climb it “for fun” every couple of weeks, and Hubs had climbed it a few times before too. It was insane! They were very supportive though, and managed to get me all the way to the top!

Here are some “happy” (aka exhausted, nerve-racking, insane) photos we took along the way.

At the start, when I was thinking “this isn’t so bad!”

The next part where Lsl PROMISED she wouldn’t take any photos of my butt! Yeah, right. I was starting to wonder what the hell I was doing up there at this stage.

Hub’s thoughts: “I love you”
Wifey’s thoughts” “How the hell am I going to get down from here?????” (click on image for up-close facial expressions!)

We made it!! The view was amazing! Half way up, I really didn’t think I was going to make it. But I was SO proud of myself, sitting up there on top of the world!

After much slipping and sliding (and torn pants) we were back down the bottom, looking up at the beast we had just conquered.

If I had known what I was getting myself in to, I probably would have chickened out, but ignorance is bliss! Thanks for the great experience Hubs and Lsl! Oh, and I NEVER want to do it again! Ha!

The epiphany toilet

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When asked “what character from Scrubs are you most like?” I have ALWAYS considered myself to be an Elliot. Although I’m not a blonde bombshell, I AM flighty, clumsy, insecure, obsessed about having a baby, and very likeable. I also gain confidence in myself when others believe in me.

But this morning, I realised I’m much more of a J.D. Okay, so I’m not a guy and I don’t ride a scooter, but I DO have full conversations in my head, I narrate my own life, (think Jamie Oliver while he’s cooking) I analyse things way too much, get very involved in people’s lives even when I shouldn’t (though, not so much anymore) and am desperate for the approval of people around me. I’m a people pleaser.

Or maybe I’m a combination of both. J-delliot?

Okay, so it’s not a HUGE epiphany (are there degrees??). I mean, it’s not like the time when I realised I was in love with Hubs when we weren’t even together, and knew without a doubt that we would spend the rest of our lives together. That was REALLY cool.

Which Scrubs character are YOU most like?

Counting my blessings

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The Spirit

Since Hubs and I arrived in Melbourne, God has been working hard to make sure we settle in okay down here. Actually, he seems to have been working overtime to pre-arrange things and ensure that everything works out for us, just as HE planned, not us. If I had my way, the following would have happened:

Hubs and I would have found a place to rent in the Moonee Ponds area
Which means:
We’d be paying around $300 a week in rent
We’d be paying around $70 per week in food
We’d be paying around $50 per week in transport
Plus bills
I’d have 2 part-time jobs and half a day off to chill-out
We’d find a nice Uniting Church with some young adults hopefully near our place

And here’s what REALLY happened:

Hubs and I were offered a place at Newman College
From day 3 (yes, it took 3 days) we have felt very welcomed and included and accepted in a tight-nit, open and inviting community
We pay very reasonable rates for accommodation, all meals and all bills
We live right next door to uni which means no regular transport costs for Hubs
I have accepted a full-time job at Newman College which means no regular transport costs for me
We live 1 suburb out of town – less than 2km from Central Station
We worship at the Chapel of the Holy Spirit at Newman College and we’re really enjoying the services
We’ve met some amazing people and had interesting conversations over good food and great wine
Hubs and I get to spend heaps of quality time together, as we have no travel time to factor in to our days
Life is good.

I spent so much time and energy (and tears) on worrying and stressing about homes, jobs and money, and surprise surprise, God had it all under control the whole time. And he does this to me ALL the time.

When am I going to learn?