I’ve tried to “add new post” about 5 times in the last week, and each time it has ended the same way – me closing my dashboard without having written a word. I think I’m suffering from a severe case of comparisonitis. I keep reading other blogs thinking “I wish I could write like that” or “I wish I could parent like that” or “I wish I could interior decorate like that.” It’s getting me nowhere.
I feel like I’m being really boring at the moment. I don’t have a lot going on that’s just for me, or for the purpose of growth and development. Oh sure I have ideas, but there’s just not a lot of action. My 101 in 1001 has been neglected for months now, and there are definitely some items that will be impossible to complete, like the ones that require me to do something for a whole year. Oh and go to South Africa. That is pretty unlikely. But I guess you never know!
One thing I have been doing almost every day is walking, and gosh it feels good. I even threw in a bit of jogging the other night, and it was much easier than I expected.
We are talking a lot about what we want to do with our house which is very exciting and lovely, but again, it’s just all talk at the moment. Once we have plans drawn up and an idea of what is happening when, it will all be a bit more real.
Hmmm what else. Oh yeah. I’m sick of talking about kid stuff to other mums. Like, seriously. I don’t have anyone up here (yet) who I can just shoot the breeze with. At playgroup it’s all “my kid does this” and “my kid started walking at this age” and “have you started Darby on solids” and “gosh my nipples are sore” and “gosh I’m tired” and “my kid doesn’t sleep through” and yadda yadda yadda. I think I just don’t like all the superficial small talk. I’ve said it all before to so many different people, that I just can’t find the energy to participate in conversations about the mundane. I want to talk about things other than my kids, though I realise that may be tricky at a playgroup.
The kids seem to have no understanding of my personal space at the moment. Absolutely none. My body is their playground and as much as I love a good snuggle and a little wrestle, I’ve been prodded, poked, stood on, slobbered on and kicked in more places than I care to list. I love my kids. No, I love my kids. I just need some quiet time during the day to recharge. That’s where the walking has been great.
I’ve just sent Hubs and the kids out on a mission to pick up a few things for the house, so I can potter around (read: have a shower) in peace and quiet.
Although, Darbs is having a little nap. Maybe I should join him…